Friday, February 3, 2006

A Few Good Witnesses


I've seen this movie before...

Justice Prosser:
What do you wanna discuss now? My favorite pastel color?

Jensen Attorney:
Justice Prosser, a moment ago you said that you ordered your lieutenant, Scott Jensen, to bring you a majority.

Prosser:
Scott is a very ambitious fellow.

Attorney:
And Lieutenant Jensen was clear on what you wanted?

Prosser:
Waterford Crystal Clear

Attorney:
Any chance Lieutenant Jensen considered the law?

Prosser:
The law is a jealous mistress.

Attorney:
Any chance Lieutenant Jensen left your office and said, 'The old man needs a campaign message'?

Prosser:
I see nuances in every position.

Attorney:
When Lieutenant Jensen spoke to the Lobby Platoon, and ordered them to pony-up the cash, any chance they ignored him?

Prosser:
You ever served in the legislature, son?

Attorney:
No, sir.

Prosser:
Ever served my forward area?

Attorney:
Sir?

Prosser:
Ever put your hands on another man's shoulders; asked him to place his hands on yours?

Attorney:
Uhhh sir?

Prosser:
We give orders, son. We give orders, or campaigns die; it's that simple. Are we clear?

Attorney:
No, not really, sir.

Prosser:
YOU-HOO; are we CLEEE-RRRRR?

Attorney:
Justice, I've just one more question before I call Bagman Joe Strohl; if you gave an order to recall Jim Holperin, and your orders are always followed, then why wasn't Holperin recalled? Why would it be necessary to send Christianson to Rhinelander?

Attorney:
Did you order the Holperin Recall?

Prosser:
I did my legislative duty, I, I....

Attorney:
DID YOU ORDER THE HOLPERIN RECALL?

Prosser:
You're GOSH DARN ROOTY PAH-TOOTY RIGHT I DID!

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